AZ Foosball Player Biographies

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Stig Aikens "choo choo"

Vital Statistics

AZ Foos Username	'Stig'
Position	Goalie
VIFA Rating	642
League Rating	-1.000
VIFA Titles	1995 North Southeastern Invitational "Least Invited Player"
League Titles
Favorite Shot(s)	Disrespector
Arch Nemesis	Clay Otis
Favorite Bitch	Slim Finger
Proudest Moment	April 5, 1999: Passed out on foos table

My Foos Biography!

Well, what can I say? I always wanted to be a blackberry farmer in the family tradition, but after my pops died from a bad case of the skitters when I was 12 years old, I decided to try my luck on the foos tables. 

After many years of practice, hard drugs, and hard women, I eventually became the best player on the bayou. Nary a man had the nerve to even speak the word "fuseball", yet alone approach a table and face the wrath of a strung out, failed berry farmer from Louisiana. Those that did left broke and humiliated, the high pitched ringing of crushing goals still stinging in their ears, along with a slew of obscenities.

Eventually, I returned to Louisiana to my original calling. And though I am not quite enjoying the high life of my father - complete with loads of money, free running liquor, and the constant green apple nasties, I do have a nice job in a local market stocking fruit and bathroom amenities.

Today, I have come to realize that fuseball is just like the blues (we often called it "bluesball"!). Both of them lure you in with the promise of fame, fortune, and a healthy digestive system, but ultimately you find that all three are plain ol' bullshit.

Comments

the situasian	Stig Aikens is why I started playing foos
macpro13	LOL ! Nice!!
Leanne	Billy...maybe you could come up with a way that the beginners that don't play on a league can have their ratings go up...it just sucks that I will never really have my rating go up even though I play on the sunday tournaments every week and sometimes on friday nights...those games or matches should count somehow for the ratings...I dont want to stay a .5 or a 1 forever...I plan on being at least an 8 by this time next year man!! Lol..Anyway let me know what you think.